First, a question for all of the more experienced bloggers who might be reading. Do any of you know what exactly causes one to receive 96 spam comments in a day?

I can only hope it is one more sign that I might finally be on the map.

I have have also been spewing nothing but “life is awesome” positivity, the last few days

So as a celebration of so many extra blog visits last night, and a reminder of what a well rounded person I am, I am going to share one of my very first blog posts (I did edit it a little, it really is amazing how much your writing style changes after just a few months of overly, harsh self criticism. It is also amazing that my inner oppressor ever lets me click the publish button.)

Gun Control

I am often accused of having anger issues. My most recent accuser was my seven year old daughter.

This accusation did not lead to her being sent to her room with no dinner, and no breakfast, just to be sure I had proved my point.

It did lead to a very revealing conversation. I was able to explain to her truthfully, that anger is the emotion I feel most comfortable with. It is just easier for me to be angry than it is for me to be sad, embarrassed, happy, etc.

The following list, as well as being an example for my readers of just exactly what sets me off, is also my personal argument for stronger gun control laws.

I am allowed to purchase a gun and that should scare all of you.

Luckily, I know better than to own a gun. The only times I have seriously considered purchasing a gun, I have been too drunk to drive myself to the gun store.

Luckily, my loved also ones know that I do not need to own a gun. Or they might just be terrified that any second my wrath could turn on them. Even after many late night phone calls, I have not been able to get a ride to any gun store.

This is the beginning of my list of people I would very likely shoot in a fit of rage if I had a gun:

  • people who chew with their mouth open, people who talk with their mouths full and people who eat too close to me.
  • people who drive too slow in the fast lane, people who won’t let me over and make me miss my exit, people who honk at me when I’m not paying attention at a stoplight, and people who give me dirty looks when I cut them off.
  • people who talk baby talk to children and animals, and people who think my children are obnoxious.
  • t-mobile customer service representatives, comcast customer service representatives, wachovia customer service representatives, and dominion virginia power customer service representatives.
  • women who say they like being pregnant, and women with children who don’t have to wear body shaping undergarments.
  • people who take up two parking spots or park right on the line, people who wait for close parking spots instead of walking, and people who think I am going to move my car just because they are about to hit me
  • people who take for ever choosing their $20 lottery tickets, when my debit card has been declined at the pump, and gas station attendants, who are unfortunate enough to work in gas stations, that don’t keep king size butterfingers in stock.
  • most of the men I have dated, and their wives.

Once I started this list I realized it could go on for miles, but I am going to assume you get the idea.

If you don’t you will soon be added to the list.