Today is the first official Word Wall Wednesday. I realize that makes two in a row but the whole point is to encourage routines and not put off until tomorrow what I can do today blah, blah, blah. I would also like to keep with the parenting theme and I am afraid that because my ex and I are getting along very well these days my kids are going to start to get the wrong idea about relationships with the opposite sex. I have to thank my parents for instilling in me such a strong fear of commitment and I can only hope that my babies daddy and I can do the same for our children. Its time for us to keep our healthy, positive communication to ourselves and think about our children’s futures. Hopefully through constant bickering, insulting each others family, upbringing and values and of course avoiding physical contact like the plague we can show our kids the dangers of romantic relationships. My personal feeling is that children should only be allowed to have fulfilling relationships when they have shown they are responsible enough to pay for their own therapy. In order to keep this educational for an eight year old girl, I’m calling it why boys are dumb.

  • Boys who drive muscle cars are not nearly as cool once you sober up.
  • If a boy wants to give you a gift then he was definitely not watching football with the guys until 4am.
  • Don’t be too embarrassed when your high school soulmate who you used to watch chick flicks with introduces you to his husband.
  • If you tell a boy where you live there is a strong chance he is hiding outside in the bushes waiting to watch you sleep.
  • When he doesn’t call you can always sit at home and eat pie with Mommy.
  • If a boy really wants you to meet his mother run for the hills.
  • Boys only laugh when you dive butt first into the toilet in the middle of the night because they left the seat up.
  • No matter what they say it will not be the hot wings a boy will gape at when he suggests you go on a date to Hooters.
  • Remember that everything happens for a reason before you take pity on a boy who tells you the story about his ex-girlfriend coming at him with a knife.
  • Before you get too excited about doing the electric slide at your wedding think about what that cute little boy is going to look like bald, except for his ears and nostrils, carrying 50 extra pounds but still wearing the same suit to a job that is going nowhere even though you gave up your scholarship to Harvard to wait tables while he finished college and raised his children while he worked on his so called career all to end up hooked on sleeping pills because his fat ass snores likes a water buffalo because that is what you are going to be stuck with for the rest of your life.